"Miss Conception" - Maria's Take

Okay, when the one passable character's single redeeming quality is that he doesn't sleep with his secretary, there's trouble.

In this bland, generic romantic comedy, Heather Graham plays Georgie, a woman who, after her boyfriend's sister has a baby, inexplicably feels her own biological clock ticking and goes on a pathetically desperate plight to procreate. Her documentary filmmaker boyfriend, Zak (ugh), does not share her sudden onset obsession with babies, and the two part ways.

Georgie becomes increasingly more desperate to have a baby after some French fertility guy (I don't think he was a doctor) tells her she has only one egg left in her ovaries. Georgie drags her two token sidekicks--a partygirl (Clem) and a gay costume designer (Justin), along for the ride.

Then this movie gets stupid.

Georgie tries everything from seducing her coworkers to harshly demanding Justin to provide his seed. Ultimately, Zak comes back from Ireland and the two reconcile and Georgie miraculously gets pregnant.

This movie personifies the double standard. Georgie and Clem objectify every man they see as little more than a potential sperm donor. They are even inexplicably cruel to Justin, when, under the insane pressure thrust upon his by his female cohorts, he does not provide Georgie with a sample. If this movie were reversed, feminist groups would be up in arms about the objectification of women. I think all objectification is wrong, male or female, but hey, what do I know?

The aesthetics of this movie are atrocious. The lighting is terrible; Heather Graham is often washed out. The cinematography is dreadful; the angles are weird and many of the shots try too hard to convey some sort of art school look, but it clashes with the tone of the film.

With Heather Graham carrying this film, the acting is obviously bad. However, the character of Zak is played well enough. It feels like a role that had Colin Firth as an inspiration, but a budget of zero. Overall this film played like a poor man's "Bridget Jones," which, let's just face it, is a poor man's "Pride and Prejudice."

This movie was painful to say the least, it never found its footing, and I was bored through most of it.

Next week, Zach and I begin a month of film flops! From "Cutthroat Island" to "Ishtar," we will document Hollywood's most famous foibles.